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One of the main
ways that we create disappointments, unhappiness, and misjudgments is
by holding on to limiting thoughts and feelings. It is not that
"holding on," in and of itself, is inappropriate. Holding on is
perfectly appropriate in many situations. I wouldn't suggest, for
instance, that you not hold on to the steering wheel of a car that you
were driving, or not hold on to a ladder that you were climbing.
Obviously, the results of such choices could be unfortunate. But have
you ever held on to a point of view even when it didn't serve you? Have
you ever held on to an emotion even though there was nothing you could
do to satisfy it, make it right, or change the situation that appeared
to cause it? This is the form of holding on that is counterproductive.
It is not that feelings don't occasionally appear to be justified. It's
just that feelings are only feelings, not who we are&emdash;and we
can easily let them go. Choosing to let them go frees us to perceive
what is actually here, and to act, or refrain from acting, accordingly.
This translates into an ability to handle life&emdash;to make
stronger, clear choices. It allows you and me to act in ways that
support us in achieving our goals and aspirations as opposed to
sabotaging them. I have seen the process of letting go of the emotions
grow into an ability to have more money, better relationships, more
radiant health and physical well-being, no matter what is going on
The Sedona Method® is a unique program I
created based on the emotional releasing techniques originated by my
mentor Lester Levenson. This method shows you how to elegantly and
easily tap your natural ability to let go of any unwanted thought or
feeling on the spot. In addition to gaining deeper awareness of the
ultimate truth and your natural state of unlimited happiness, this
program can free you to have more personal and financial success, and
break bad habits and other self-sabotaging behaviors.
Letting go is the opposite of holding on. Both letting go and holding
on are part of the natural process of life. This fundamental
understanding is the basis of the Sedona Method.®
Letting go, or
releasing, is a natural ability that we're all born with, but which we
get conditioned against using as we mature into adulthood. Where so
many of us frequently get stuck is that we don't know when it is
appropriate to let go and when it is appropriate to hold on. And most
of us err on the side of holding on--often to our detriment.
It is interesting to note the emotional component of holding on and
releasing, and the degree to which our bodies are impacted by our
feelings. Have you noticed that, when people are upset, they often hold
their breath? In the process of breathing, both inhalation and
exhalation can be inhibited by holding on to unresolved emotions. Most
of us also hold residual tension in our muscles, which never allows us
to relax fully. Again, it is the unresolved or suppressed emotions that
are the basis for these forms of constriction.
But why do we get stuck? When we suppress our emotions, rather than
allowing ourselves to experience our feelings fully in the moment they
arise, they linger and make us uncomfortable. Through avoidance, we are
preventing our emotions from flowing through us, either transforming or
dissolving, and it doesn't feel good.
Have you ever watched a very young child fall down and then look around
to see if there is any reason to be upset? When children think no one
is watching them, in an instant they just let go, brush themselves off,
and act like nothing has happened. The same child in a similar
situation, on seeing the opportunity to get attention, may burst into
tears and run to the arms of a parent. Or have you ever watched a young
child get furious with a playmate or parent, and even say something
like, "I hate you and will never speak to you again," and then, just a
few minutes later, the child feels and acts as though nothing at all
has happened? This natural ability to release our emotions was lost to
most of us because, even though we did it automatically as young
children, without conscious control, our parents, teachers, friends,
and society as a whole trained us out of it as we got older. In fact,
it is because we were unconscious of our ability to release that it was
possible to train us to hold on.
Every time we were told "no," told to behave, to sit still and be
quiet, to stop squirming, that "big boys don't cry" or "big girls don't
get angry," and to grow up and be responsible, we learned to suppress
our emotions. Furthermore, we were often seen as an adult when we got
to the point where we were good at suppressing our natural exuberance
for life and all the feelings that others convinced us to believe were
unacceptable. We became more responsible to others' expectations of us
rather than to the needs of our own emotional well-being.
The balancing point and natural alternative to inappropriate
suppression and expression is releasing, or letting go&emdash;what
we call the Sedona Method®. It is the equivalent of
the heat and safely beginning to empty the contents of your inner
pressure cooker. Because every feeling that has been suppressed is
trying to vent itself, releasing is merely a momentary stopping of the
inner action of holding these feelings in so you can allow them to
leave, which you will find they do easily under their own steam.
Though you have probably become an expert at suppression and/or
expression, even so, you are still letting go. True laughter, for
instance, is one of the ways that you let go spontaneously, and the
benefits of laughter in the area of health and stress elimination are
well documented. Think of the last time you had a really good belly
laugh. You may have been watching a funny program on TV or having a
conversation with a friend, and all of a sudden, something struck you
as funny. As you laughed, you probably felt lighter and lighter inside
and progressively happier and more relaxed, almost warm and euphoric.
This is also a good description of what you may experience at times
when you learn to use the process of The Sedona Method®.
most of the time you won't laugh out loud as you let go, you will often
smile and feel the same sense of inner relief that comes from true
Have you ever lost your keys or your glasses and turned the whole house
upside down only to find them in your pocket? When you found them you
let out a sigh of relief--Aahhh--as your tension
and anxiety melted away as you discovered you already had the keys, or
the glasses, all along. This is another example of how you release
As you perfect your use of The Sedona Method®, you will
find yourself able to go right to this point of realization and
relaxation, even on longstanding issues that you were tearing your life
apart trying to resolve. You will discover that the answers have been
right inside you all along.
permission from The Sedona Method: Your
Key to Lasting Happiness, Success, Peace and Emotional Well-being copyright 2003 by Hale
Dwoskin, foreword by Jack Canfield (Sedona Press).
Hale Dwoskin is an international speaker, facilitator and
author. He has taught the Sedona Method for over a quarter of a century
to individuals and in corporations throughout the U.S. and the UK. He
is CEO and Director of Training of Sedona Training Associates, an
organization that teaches courses based on the emotional releasing
techniques originated by his mentor, Lester Levenson. For more
information, please call (888) 282-5656 or visit SedonaMethod.com.
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